


Security Vetting

by latin_cat



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: Gen, Humor, UNIT
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2017-01-09
Packaged: 2018-09-16 01:56:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9268559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/latin_cat/pseuds/latin_cat
Summary: There is an intruder at UNIT HQ, and the Doctor feels compelled to investigate.





	

**Author's Note:**

> With thanks to Sharpiefan for beta reading this for me.

The Doctor frowned at his instruments, but there was no doubting the readings; there was definitely a rogue non-human lifeform in UNIT HQ and, what was more, it had been in his lab that morning. Twice.

“And you’re certain you didn’t see anything, Jo?” the Doctor asked again. “Nothing even slightly out of the ordinary? No ripple in the air? No strange feeling as if you were being watched – or a momentary loss of concentration, perhaps?”

Jo shook her head.

“No, Doctor. Nothing in the slightest.”

Which was very worrying. The Doctor’s frown deepened. Even with the most advanced cloaking technology there was usually some tell-tale distortion and, though limited as far as perception was concerned, when it came to primeval senses for the uncanny, humans were second to none.

“Then we’re dealing with something incredibly sophisticated,” he muttered to himself. “Highly adept at concealing itself, possibly even genetically engineered for that purpose, and in all likelihood very dangerous.”

And yet nothing in the lab had been disturbed. Not the slightest thing had been moved out of place, nor was there anything missing; he’d checked. Even the splints for the Bunsen burners were all present and correct – which as a rule never happened, but Yates hadn’t been by for a couple of days, so that could be eliminated from the equation. Jo's expression became worried.

“Dangerous?”

“Yes. And until we can find a way to accurately locate it, we can’t discover where it’s from or what it wants.”

“Shouldn’t we tell the Brigadier?” Jo prompted. “If there’s something in the base that shouldn’t be here, he’ll want to know right away.”

“Hm. On this occasion you’re right, Jo,” the Doctor said. He switched the instrument back to monitoring, picking up a small remote unit. “After all, there’s nothing we can do immediately. I’ll leave the detector running here, just in case it comes back. The portable unit will alert me if it comes within ten yards of us.”

Jo looked at him sceptically.

“That’s not much warning,” she said.

“No,” the Doctor conceded. “But that’s the best we have at the moment. With any luck, we should get a general direction too. Come along, Jo!”

And before she could reply he was out the lab door and striding down the corridor in the direction of the Brigadier’s office. Letting go a frustrated sigh, Jo took off after him.

“Doctor, wait!” she called – but it turned out she needn’t have bothered. The Doctor was only a few yards away, having reached the end of the corridor and stopped dead in his tracks. There was a red light flashing on the remote in his hand.

“Doctor –?” she began to ask as she came up behind him, but he impatiently waved her to silence. A few seconds passed before the Doctor spoke.

“It’s somewhere up ahead,” he intoned in a low voice. “Signal’s not that strong, so it can’t be very big. Well, that’s something, I suppose.”

From then on they proceeded slowly, the Doctor leading the way, the detector held out in front of him. They were in the main house now, and various UNIT personnel they passed looked on with expressions of curiosity, suspicion and confusion. The Doctor didn’t pay any attention to them, however, and simply carried on following the readings on the remote – up the main staircase, across the first floor landing, off to the left, then down another corridor.

“Is it moving?” Jo whispered.

“No,” the Doctor answered. “No, it’s stationary for now. It should be –” He stopped so suddenly that Jo ran into the back of him. “It’s in this room!”

He turned to the door he’d stopped next to, and it was exactly in the same instant that Jo gasped – “But that’s the Brigadier’s office!” – that the Doctor realised where they were. A sense of alarm immediately overcame him. The remote indicated that there were two lifeforms the other side of the door, and one was very distinctly human. If the Brigadier was in there with the creature there wasn’t a moment to lose, as heavens knew what might happen if it should become aggressive. Quick as a flash, the Doctor twisted the door handle, flung open the door, and stepped purposefully over the threshold.

Someone must have recently brought around elevenses, for the Brigadier looked up in amazement from where he was seated at his desk, hand poised with a digestive mid-dunk over his coffee.

“Doctor!”  he exclaimed. Initial surprise turned almost instantly to irritation. “What the devil do you think you’re playing at?”

“Quick, Jo!” the Doctor urged. “Get in here and shut the door!”

“Doctor!”

“Please, Brigadier, there’s no time to explain!” the Doctor cut the man off as Jo slammed the door firmly shut. Then, a sense of apology entering his voice, he held up his hands in a placating manner. “I need you to remain calm, and stay exactly where you are.”

The Brigadier was about to answer back, but at that moment the soft half of the digestive, having been abandoned to gravity, fell into his mug with a gentle _plop_ and splashed coffee onto the open reports on the desk.

“Blast!” he hissed, fumbling for his handkerchief to clean up the mess. “Doctor, this had better be good!”

“Trust me, Brigadier,” the Doctor implored. “I’ve reason to believe –”

His voice died in his throat as he cast his eyes down to the remote. What? No. That couldn’t be right, surely?

“Doctor,” the Brigadier asked, clearly doing his best to keep his temper in check. “What is this all about?”

But the Doctor, presumably not having heard a word he said, looked up at the Brigadier in astonishment.

“It’s on your lap!” he exclaimed.

At first the Brigadier sat there looking highly confused, but instead of the further demand for an explanation the Doctor expected, an expression of guilt, followed swiftly by defiance, swept across the man’s face.

“So what if it is?” he demanded.

The Doctor’s eyebrows shot up to meet his hairline.

“You know about it?” he asked, taken aback. The Brigadier snorted.

“Be damned stupid if I didn’t,” he said tartly. The Doctor’s expression darkened.

“Brigadier,” he said, an edge of steel creeping into his voice. “I suggest that you stand up slowly.”

“Really, Doctor, I’ve had just about enough of –”

“Lethbridge-Stewart,” the Doctor snapped. “Stop arguing and stand up!”

“But –”

“Now!”

Seeing that he would clearly get no peace until he complied, the Brigadier heaved a sigh and stood up, pushing something down off his lap as he did so. He glared at the Doctor.

“There,” he said crisply. “Now are you satisfied?”

But the Doctor’s eyes were focussing on the foot of the Brigadier’s desk, waiting for the creature to break cover. A shadow moved, then out from behind the desk came… a cat.

The Doctor blinked.

The cat blinked at the Doctor, annoyed.

“Brigadier,” the Doctor asked quietly. “What is this?”

Lethbridge-Stewart frowned.

“Surely you know a cat when you see one?” he asked, but the Doctor waved an impatient hand.

“Yes, yes; I know it’s a cat!” he said testily. “But what is it doing here?”

“They were having a problem with vermin in the garages,” the Brigadier replied, wondering where this was all going. “Rather than call in outside exterminators, Benton asked up at Cooper’s Farm if they had a spare cat they could let us have.”

The Doctor continued to exchange glares with the cat. It was black and white. It had green eyes. It was wearing a buff-coloured collar. There was a little UNIT badge dangling from its collar where otherwise a bell might be, clearly adapted from a spare uniform collar-dog.

“How long has she been here?” he demanded.

“About two weeks.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me?”

“Doctor,” The Brigadier pinched the bridge of his nose with a pained expression. “It’s a cat.”

“That’s no excuse!” the Doctor retorted. “You are supposed to keep me informed of all new personnel stationed here!”

“But it’s a cat.”

“You do surprise me! And I suppose you had her vetted?”

“If you mean did we have it –”

The Doctor threw his arms up in exasperation.

“Honestly, am I the only one who gives a damn about security around here?” he asked of the room in general. Jo and the Brigadier exchanged glances. “I have a perimeter set up around my lab to monitor for higher functioning non-human lifeforms. What am I supposed to think when –”

He stopped mid-sentence as something occurred to him. He rounded on Jo, who suddenly looked very guilty.

“You knew there was a cat, didn’t you?”

Jo grinned sheepishly.

“Sorry, Doctor,” she said. “You asked me if I’d seen anything unusual. I thought you knew about the cat.”

“You let her into my lab?”

“A couple of times,” she admitted. “Only when you were out. I didn’t think it’d do any harm.”

The Doctor looked from her to the Brigadier, bewildered.

“Not do any… Unbelievable! You let someone with no security clearance whatsoever go about Headquarters as they please, and you don’t think it’ll do any harm? What if she’s spying for the Master? Or anyone else, for that matter?”

“But it’s –”

“And don’t say ‘it’s a cat’! It’s abundantly clear it’s a cat!” The Doctor bent down and scooped up the offending creature, which during the past minute had grown bored and started washing itself on the carpet. He addressed it sternly. “And as for you, I have some questions for you to answer. You’re coming with me!”

And with that the Doctor turned on his heel, bewildered cat in arms, marched out of the office and, presumably, back to his lab. Jo grinned at the look of open-mouthed astonishment on the Brigadier’s face.

“Don’t worry, Brigadier,” she said cheerily. “I’ll make sure Mavis gets a fair hearing.”

And she followed the Doctor out, shutting the door behind her.

Left alone, the Brigadier sat back down at his desk and wondered just what on earth had taken place. After a moment he bent down, picked up the saucer of milk he’d just poured out before the Doctor’s dramatic entrance, and tipped the contents into his now undrinkable coffee.


End file.
